"I looked for you in the darkness, I searched for you in the light, but all I had to
do was look inwards, for you were somewhere deep inside"
Just
when I was wondering as to why I have titled my blog as ‘LETS TALK SUCCESS’ even
though I have not been able to achieve “success” in what I have been struggling
for since years, that I met my long awaited “success”. Finally, I got a government
job, which I have been longing for since years. Though I tasted the fruits of
success, I was not sure that this was what would be my reaction after achieving
it. I began to think over it. I was reminded of the days when I would literally
give up everything in my life, no matter how dear it was to me, to see this day
or this thing called “success” happening to me. But now, when it is actually
happening to me, why is it that I’m not jumping out of joy or dancing in
happiness or screaming out of madness? This is not to say that I didn’t enjoy
my selection, I’m thankful to God that this happened to me. I consider myself
to be really lucky. But something was missing I thought.
Retrospection actually forced me to think about the rigorous
course of my preparation for this examination. Was I not then successful, when
I woke up every morning with a desire to perform better than the previous day?
Was I not successful when I got happiness from answering the questions of KBC
sitting with my friends? Was I not then successful, when I would take a break
from long hours of study and go out to eat momos? Was I not successful then when
I would appreciate spending time with my loved ones? Is not staying put when
everyone else has backed out a success? Is not dreaming big and then striving
hard to achieve it a success? Yes, this is what success is. Success is not a
destination. Deriving pleasure out of small little things is true success.
But in the midst of the desire to achieve something “big”, I
feel somewhere I have missed out on the simpler pleasures that life has to
offer. I have never built great relationships to avoid distractions, I have given
up smaller dreams to run after that “bigger” one, I have disappointed my
friends innumerable number of times for cancelling our get together plans, I have
missed out many ceremonies back home to attend to the books. In short, I was
too busy in postponing little happiness to savor it in the future once I get
“successful” in life.
But now that I have become “successful”, I am actually
regretting the wonderful times that I could have had. Life is short. Sometimes
we get so busy in chasing the bigger pleasures of life that we lose sight of
the smaller ones. If we are able to relish the moment without losing sight of
our dreams, desires and ambitions that my dear friends is what I call true
success. So go out, chase your dreams, build strong relationships, make your
friends and family happy, tell them that you care for them, for this life is short
and its days numerable.
